Seriously, what gives?! This is just getting ridiculous. If it were possible for me to throw in the towel, I would. Unfortunately, this isn't one of those things I can just give up on. Or fortunately. I really shouldn't say like I'm mad I'm getting a baby out of the deal. I just never realized how long 9 months really is.
...And can I just ask, why the hell do they say that?? No one is ever really pregnant for only 9 months. At least not the majority of women in America. If you're one of the few lucky ones, shut up and don't talk to me. But seriously. We're pregnant for 10 months. I think we need to inform some people who are very wrong. If I were only pregnant for 9 months, I'd be holding my baby boy in my arms right now, rather than typing like a mad woman on my laptop. But no, even though I'm 9 months pregnant, the big ol "PSYCH!" card gets pulled on me and ohhhh heyyy, I gotta wait a whole 'nother month. Excuse my french but F that. This blows. And I hate when people ask me "So how far along are you?" Because what am I supposed to answer? If I say 9 months, they look at me terrified and they're like "Oh my God, should you be standing? Do you want a chair? Is he like, gonna pop out anytime now? What's your due date?" At that point, all you can do is roll your eyes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, technically, my due date isn't until July 27th. "Oh so you're not really 9 months then." What?? Are you retarded? Yes, I am actually 9 months. They're like "So that actually makes you 8 months, not 9." What are you people, the freakin' pregnancy nazi's? I'm pretty sure it's July, and I've been pregnant since late October/early November. I've been pregnant for 37 1/2, 38 weeks. How many weeks are in a month genius? 4. Do me a favor, divide 37 by 4. HEYYYY!!! What do you know? The pregnant lady was right! She has in fact been pregnant for as long as she says she has! Wow. Morons.
I think I'm a little on edge lately. Would you agree? I hear that's what the end is like though. Ugh. This is so sucky. I've become so miserable, and totally not meaning to, I'm making everyone else around me miserable too. I'm so terrible. I'm just so sick of being so fat and uncomfortable. I've come to the point where I end up watching the crappiest shows on tv for the sad fact that it's too hard for me to lean forward to reach the remote in order to change the channel. And forget about getting up. I can't do that on my own. I can't even dress myself without breaking a sweat and falling onto the bed.
I was looking forward to today's doctor's appointment for the past week. Last week, I went on Tuesday, I was exactly 36 weeks. The doctor gave me an exam and said I was starting to dilate, I was 1 cm. Nothing too exciting, but it's something. So I took it and ran with it. I've been trying everything. Anything I hear speeds up the process I've been trying (within reason). And all to see what would happen when I went in to this appointment, a week and a half later. See how much more I had dilated, if any. And guess what? The doc didn't even check me!!! Needless to say, I was terribly disappointed. Seriously, what the hell? Pregnant women are your job description. Shouldn't you know better than to disappoint one? She just told me, once again, that my baby is big. Fabulous. I'm going to push an enormous child out of my tiny vag. Yeah, ok. We'll see. Now I have to wait a whole 'nother week to see what happens. IF I make it that long. But let me tell you, I am DETERMINED to not make it till then. I'm too sick of being miserable. And this pain?? What is this all about?? For like 2 weeks now I've been having this terrible back and belly pain that brings me to tears. I'm so over this. I'd much rather just deal with the day or so of pain in labor and get it over with than continuing on this path of daily torture. Hmmm...maybe we need to have more sex. Yep, that's it. More sex is always the right plan. I'll keep you all posted. Wouldn't it be wonderful if tomorrow I posted "Baby's Here!!!" Yeah... =/
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